Get ready for a spooky treat all about a spooky drum, all played in spooky DC style, meaning the ending is a complete insult to the reader's intelligence!
I'm not sure I'd get many laughs if I was in a fancy club and had to listen to some drum circle hippie bang away on his own for 20 minutes, but our protagonist, a drummer in a nightclub band, has a very sophisticated sense of humour.
Yep, there's nothing a nightclub owner likes more than complete, glassy-eyed silence from the audience. Because who wants to sell drinks, anyway?
This guy drives a hard bargain-- makes one cheap offer, then pretends to give up.
Yeah, who could possibly have stolen that drum? Certainly not the guy who came in a few hours earlier, made a half-hearted offer to buy the drum, then gave up immediately upon being turned down? Stealing this here pocket watch makes this the perfect crime! Slick!!
Oh man, now not only is he making headlines with this stolen drum, he's made a little song about how it's really a haunted drum! This Babaloo-starved crowd eats it up, too! I get the feeling the cops couldn't have been looking too hard for the stolen drum, seeing as how, y'know, this guy's getting famous specifically by headlining with it.
And then of course it all comes crashing down, yadda yadda drum's really haunted, yadda yadda he vows to get rid of it. Obviously the only way to remove the curse would be to return it, but then we wouldn't have much of a story, would we? Well, okay, we don't have much of a story anyway but we'd have even LESS of a story, I mean. I blame the Comics Code Authority.
Yep, this'll work.
But the drum came back the very same day... you can see where this is going, right?
And so on.
Oh no! There was a logical explanation for the drum coming back again and again! Well, what passes for "logic" in the DC Universe, anyway. See, he dumped the drum in a lake and boy scouts found it, then he destroys the drum, which the handyman then fixes despite it being broken into splinters, but the boy scouts hadn't yet returned the drum so I guess he destroyed the manufacturer's copy...? Then burnt it...? It's not like the people who mailed him this copy drum would've included, I dunno, a note or something asking for his endorsement? Why do the cops know this and he doesn't? And this replica drum is all ready on the market and being advertised in newspapers, despite not having his endorsement...?
Er, I mean, yes, totally logical explanation. And that logical explanation can be summed up in four words:
"we ran outta paper".
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